Wednesday, November 3, 2010

It's Blogapalooza!

"It's Blogapalooza! A chance for you to meet some exciting new writers AND score some exciting prizes. All you have to do is read my post below, and then visit the 7 bloggers listed at the end and read their entries, while trying to find the common phrase used in all eight. NOTE: It WILL be a phrase (ex. "raining cats and dogs") so single words like "the" or "and" don't count! Once you think you have it, email it to mikewood_3@yahoo.com and you will be put into the running for a great gift "basket" comprised of prizes personally selected by the eight bloggers. A random drawing from all correct entries will be conducted one week from today, with special preference given to those who choose to follow all eight of us! Good luck and have fun!"




So the other day I was driving home when a motorcycle carrying two leather clad men pulled out in front of me. I ended up following them for a few miles, which gave me time to marvel at how determined the guy in the back was to not hold on to the guy in front. Rather than wrapping his arms around him or holding onto his shoulders, he settled for precariously grasping the rack behind him. The road was pretty bumpy, and there were several times he came close to falling off, but still he refused to clutch on to his buddy. I was tempted to pull alongside them at the next light and say, "Listen dude, you're already riding bitch, you might as well be safe doing it. I mean look at you! Your legs are wrapped around your friend's thighs. You're sitting ass to crotch. Does it really make a difference that your hands aren't touching him?"

Of course, I said nothing, which is why I am still alive to write about it, but it got me thinking about all the stupid things people do to look cool. I'm not talking about Fonzie cool, I mean the guy who's "too cool" to carry an umbrella in a rainstorm. Does he really think spending the rest of the day soaking wet is any cooler?   He's not cool, he's cold. Or the pretty girl who's "too cool" to catch the food flung at her by the hibachi chef. Does she really think being a cold bitch is cool? Not only is she not cool, her hotness starts to fade a bit as well. I can understand not wanting to look foolish, but if the act of not looking foolish makes you look foolish, well that's just foolish!

And there's no rhyme or reason to it. We've all seen guys who are too cool to dance at weddings, which is fine. Don't dance. That's cool. But when they sit there like stumps all night, only to jump up to do the Macafreakinrena, what message do they think they're sending? They turn their noses up at us pogoing to "Mony Mony" but give a thumbs up to line dancing to cheesy Spaniards? I don't get it. Which is why I guess I will never be cool. But  then again, you'll never catch me riding bitch either! How you like them apples?

Now head on to the blogs below and find the mystery phrase:


Have fun

12 comments:

  1. You're not being a n00b and posting your answer here, are you? Email it to me at mikewood_3@yahoo.com

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  2. Oh Mikey, it doesn't matter whether you're riding or not, you're still my bitch.

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  3. I enjoyed your post. Good luck with your first bloggapalooza!

    Michael

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  4. Not cool is the new cool. Or so I've been told. :) (I'm done with the less-than-3s, going wtih the creepy sideways smile these days)

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  5. Them apples is pretty funny. Although, I think there's one place any self-respecting guy should keep his mystic of being cool and that's at the grocery store. Crapatola! If I see another pansy on the phone with his wife asking her about one product vs another - I'm gonna puke. That's all I'm saying...

    Murphy

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  6. I'm with Kurt Cobain: Monkey see, Monkey do; rather be dead than cool... or something like that. That is my Pacific Northwest sensibilities talking though.

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  7. Great topic...the same guys are probably going to run out on the football field and pat each other on the ass. Sheesh.

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  8. What a fun blog idea Mike! And cool is as cool does. I think those two guys would've been cool to Christine no matter if he hung on to the driver or not...I'm pretty sure the ass to crotch comment convinced her!

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  9. Neevr say neevr Mkie! Taht's petrty wlel a gruatene taht it'll hpaepn! :)

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  10. ha ha this post had me in stitches, dont tell anyone but i love the Macarena ai am even teaching my toddler to dance it.

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  11. Lol, good post Mike. Men can be juvenile about things like that, and I learned a new phrase: riding bitch. Lol, never heard of that before. Hope that doesn't make me uncool.

    Evie

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