Thursday, November 18, 2010

Canned Laughter

I came home rather late last night, at least for a Wednesday, and realizing I had nothing ready to post for today's entry, figured I could either go to bed and just run one of my emergency back-up pieces, or stay up and tipsily try to wing it. I'll leave it to you to decide what I did...

Lately I've been thinking about Mixed Nuts, which is strange since I'm not particularly fond of nuts. Sure,  I enjoy the occasional cashew, and almonds are rather tasty, but for the most part, nuts rank pretty low on my snack food scale. But, I'm honestly interested about the intended purpose of Mixed Nuts. Are they meant to be eaten by the random handful, or individually? Are they a cost saving measure, where rather than buying a can of peanuts, jar of cashews, bag of walnuts, and basket of filberts (whatever the eff they are!) one could buy one can and please everyone? Or maybe they're just cleverly packaged leftovers, a sort of halfway home for all the remaining nuts that weren't enough to fill another individual jar. And then you have Fancy Mixed Nuts, the gated community of legumes, with cans proudly proclaiming that they contain less than 50% peanuts. Who decides which nuts make the cut and which don't?

So, as you can see, I have many questions. The obvious response would be to tell me I'm nuts, but before dismissing me like that, consider that this could all be an elaborate metaphor meant to provoke thoughtful questions about our own society. Or it could just be that I'm half-drunk! Either way, today's post is officially in the can!


  1. Whew...Thought you were going to talk about the family.......

  2. "you are what you eat and i eat nuts everyday" Moiself ;)

  3. This is important stuff. As with most important stuff, it leads to only more questions. Like, "What about Chex mix?" Maybe God invented mixed snacks as an ice breaker, a way to bring people together. A kind of a canned Just as there are hardcore cashew people, surely somewhere is someone who loves those peanuts that still have the paper junk on them. And maybe there is a cashew lover out there who doesn't mind kissing someone who is picking peanut paper from between their teeth.

  4. Thanks all - in the clear light of day (and even in the dark of night) this post has got to be, as the Comic Book Guy from "The Simpsons" would say, The Worst Entry Ever! - but I appreciate the comments

    And Dave, who say's I'm not talking about the family?

    BTW Teri, 'peanut paper' is a great term, first I've heard it